Worst morning ever!

As many of you know, I saved up all my hard-earned money (and borrowed some of my mom’s hard-earned money) and bought a Prius on my birthday. I love my car and I’ve enjoyed 29 days of fuel-efficient bliss with it.

My Prius before the accident

Today, on my way to work, one of the shittiest things ever happened… I was rear-ended!

I’ve always thought that the light on Colfax and Tremont was an accident magnet because I constantly see people running the red or slamming on their breaks when they realize they’re about to run the red. Because of these observations, I’m always extra careful when crossing that way.

I saw that the light before the deadly intersection was yellow, so I slowed down to stop at the red. Apparently, the woman behind me didn’t see the light at all and slammed right into my poor little car at full speed!

The impact was so hard that my glasses went flying off my face and into the dashboard, my bag, which had been on the seat beside me, went catapulting forward and my iPod went crashing into the console.

My Prius after the accident

I was totally shocked and put the car in park so I could get out and see the damages. When I stood up and got out of my seat, my head felt heavy, like when you have a really bad head ache, and I realized how hard I’d been hit. The muscles on the left side of my neck were starting to lock up as the whole situation started becoming clearer.

I walked back to my seat and sat down as I started sobbing uncontrollably.

When I called 911, I was shaking and sobbing so hard I could barely talk. They kept asking if I wanted an ambulance, but I didn’t think I needed one as I wasn’t bleeding and had managed to stand up and walk out of the car.

An officer finally arrived about 20-30 minutes later and informed me that the woman who hit me had an expired insurance policy and a Mexico driver’s license.

Uninsured.

Not a citizen of this country.

This means my insurance has to pay to fix my car and I get stuck paying the deductible! My agent informed me that, because the woman who hit me had no insurance and wasn’t a citizen, any hope of recovering the funds from her was highly unlikely.

I did manage to go to work, which took my mind off things until my head and neck started hurting pretty bad and had to call it quits to take more Advil and lie down.

Now I’m concerned that my neck and head will feel like shit in the morning and that there might be more wrong with me than I’d originally assumed. That, and the pain in the ass it will be to try to take my car to the shop and wait for it to get fixed. Oh, and of course, knowing that I’ll be paying for all this.

Naturally all this had to happen the week before the DNC — only the busiest time since I started at my job!

I still don’t really know how I’m going to manage the financial impact of this accident… but, hey, at least I’m not severely injured.

Film on the Rocks weekly wrap-up

Last night was fun, despite me being sick from dehydration. Astra Moveo was really good. The lead singer’s voice sounded great on every song and it was pretty impressive.

I also got my new Trashwire bumper stickers yesterday, so I gave them out to tons of people. I also made my mark on the famed signature wall by sticking one to a ceiling section that didn’t have any writing on it.

The guys from Mile High Sci-Fi did a great job with their short version of Big Trouble in Little China. In one particularly funny move, they threw in “Beat It” in a sequence where two rival gangs were battling in an alley.

I was super tired and still not feeling that great, so I left after the classic cartoon and didn’t stay for the movie.

On the way home, we stopped an Winchell’s. The dude at the counter gave us like 300 donuts for less than $10. It was insane. We ordered what we wanted and we were joking about our choices. He was listening to what we were saying and laughing at our jokes. Then he went down the line and added a shit load more to the box. He was like, “Here, for free for you ladies. I’m tired and I wanna go home, so here’s a bunch of free ones.” Who could resist free donuts?

Good mileage, free stuff, and bagels too?!

I got 44 mpg on my way to work today They say there’s a real art to effectively driving a hybrid. You have to know when to press the gas and how much pressure to apply to ensure that the car uses the electric motor instead of the gas one. There are entire communities on websites devoted to tips and tricks for how to drive a hybrid and save a nice chunk of change on your gas bills.

Today, on my drive to work, I went from young Padawan learner to full fledged Prius Jedi when I managed to get 44 mpg on the short trip.

You see, contrary to popular belief (and usually Toyota ads and EPA figures) the Prius does not actually get better mileage in town than on the highway. Like a normal car, highway driving is usually where you can see the bigger mpg numbers. I think this is because the Prius still uses a gas engine some of the time, and gas engines are better in highway driving, making the use of your gas engine during this time more efficient. In my typical stop-and-go city driving, I’ve been about to achieve high 30s and occasionally a 40 or 41 in my miles per gallon.

Today was different. Today, I paid extra attention to the little graph that shows how much gas you’re using and tried to make sure it stayed in the 50s when possible. This kind of crazy gas monitoring is probably not advisable if you’re driving in a lot of traffic because looking down at the bar chart every three seconds can definitely be dangerous.

When I finally pulled into the parking lot, I glanced down and saw a 44 in the display screen. With my drive to work being short and my walking-distance proximity to tons of stuff downtown, I feel like I’ll only have to fill up my car every 13 years!

Free promotional itemsThen, when I got into the office, it was even better. There was a Sprint rental and tons of cell phone vendors with free stuff to give out.

I don’t know what it is about cheap free shit, but I just had to have some. I managed to score a really weird squishy stress ball and a bunch of pens. Shawnna and I kept making trips past the vendor booths and grabbing more free crap, distributing our vast collections throughout the office for everyone to enjoy.

Then, as if a day of good mileage and free promotional schwag wasn’t enough, Dori told me there were tons of bagels in the kitchen. A cheaper commute, free tacky pens and stuff, and now free food! The fact that these things make me so happy proves I’m easy to please.

Woman who is NOT Britney Spears finds Cheesus

This just in…

A Missouri woman says she has found Jesus in a bag of Cheetos. When Kelly Ramey opened a snack-sized bag of Cheetos, she felt something unusual and checked it out.

Most of her family and friends believe it looks like a mini orange sculpture of Jesus on the cross. Ramey and her husband call it “Cheesus.” Others see something completely different.

A local minister does not see anything theologically special about the Cheeto, but thinks some good could come from it.

Ramey doesn’t plan to sell the Cheeto because it’s bringing a lot of joy into her home. She will keep it in a safe deposit box or put it on display so more people can enjoy it.

I think they’re focusing on the wrong thing in this story. The real headline should read “Woman who isn’t Britney Spears finds Cheeto Jesus”. The shocking part of this story is not that some crazy chick thinks Jesus is in Cheetos, but that that crazy chick is NOT Brit Brit. Britney has been scouring bags of Cheetos for a lifetime and is yet to discover any divine imagery within the processed snacks.