Here are just three of my favorite headlines from Brian Bolter and the gang at Fox5 in DC…

“When asked about hygiene, one child told a state official recently, he washes himself with a bar of soap and a sock because nobody will give him a washcloth.”

“Police are looking for four inmates on the loose. Last night they overpowered a jail guard using warm, soapy water.”

“A kid gets drunk while his mother gives birth.”

I miss the sensational headlines from good ol’ Fox5 now that I’m in Denver, where our local news is more of an anchor love fest than an informative program. Back in DC, we used to get the panic/hysteria teasers and 10 second bumps just before the show. Here, all we get is reporters reading us information in between complimenting each other on their hair or outfits. I miss my panic news. The news out here is too calm and relaxed.

Here’s one from Geraldo At Large for the road:
“There’s nothing wrong with your TV, you are watching small children ride sheep.”