That’s right. That’s Zach Randolph of the Clippers punching Lou Amundson of the Suns in the face. Amundson was just fine and proved it with a sick dunk that had the guys on the bench out of their seats.

I’ve seen quite a few basketball fights in my day, including one that left my dad with a broken wrist, but this one was extra exciting. I just kept thinking, “I wish I had flown back from Phoenix on Wednesday instead of Monday!”

In the end, the Suns emerged victorious, winning 140-100, the largest margin of victory after a coaching change in NBA history!

Congrats to the Suns and to my dad, Alvin Gentry, on the win!

Maybe I should think twice about not getting that NBA League Pass.

But my favorite take on the “Bale-Out” is the Tracy Jordan TGS rant.

After the dispute over her age, the next big topic was her relationship with the father. It was reported that he was an Iraqi native, then a war vet, then a contractor hired to work in Iraq–either way, people were giving him an Iraq connection. Well the latest news seems to be that it’s not the father of the babies, but rather the father of the mother (or the litter’s grandfather if you need clarification) that’s heading to Iraq, allegedly to earn money to raise his daughter’s 47 million kids.

Of course, there is also the revelation that the mother already had six kids, so the addition of the new eight brings her total to 14. There have also been reports that a few of the six were twins/multiple births, but I’ve only seen that on one or two sites, so it doesn’t seem to have gone through the rigorous fact-checking that the rest of this “news” had to pass.

There are now reports that the whole thing happened via sperm donor and that the mother could be a mentally ill woman who tricked a doctor into helping her get pregnant because of her obsession with children.

I’m writing all this down to illustrate the way that the internet spins things completely out of control. Whoever has the most recent post is the most credible source and everyone can write something different, saying they don’t want to reveal their sources. Just take a look at some of the gaping holes and complete inaccuracies in Wikipedia, the supposed repository for all knowledge, and you should start to think twice about the “facts” on the internet.

I don’t know why the world is so fascinated with this woman in the first place, let alone to the point where everyone needs to make up the most amazing breaking news about her.

Whenever I think reality tv has hit rock bottom, something new comes on that takes it to an all new low.

The latest contender is Rock of Love Bus on VH1. The show follows Bret Michaels (who used to be known for being the lead singer of Poison but is now a puffy, middle aged reality star) and the gaggle of skanks vying for his affection, or at least a little tv time. Instead of the usual tacky mansion, this time the whole gang will be living out of buses as they follow Michaels around the country during his tour.

Read more at Trashwire.com or read the uncensored version after the jump…

Whenever I think reality tv has hit rock bottom, something new comes on that takes it to an all new low.

The latest contender is Rock of Love Bus on VH1. The show follows Bret Michaels (who used to be known for being the lead singer of Poison but is now a puffy, middle aged reality star) and the gaggle of skanks vying for his affection, or at least a little tv time. Instead of the usual tacky mansion, this time the whole gang will be living out of buses as they follow Michaels around the country during his tour.

The early stand outs were Brazilian alcoholic Marcia, Paris Hilton/Juliette Lewis hybrid Ashley, fake gypsy Constandina, the female Mickey Rourke Gia, and of course Nikki, who DListed called a “ladyboy muppet”.

Nikki was simultaneously repulsive and intriguing. The term hot mess doesn’t even scratch the surface for a girl who carries a slew of “legal drugs” and never really seems to know where she is at any given moment. This girl might be the most vile skank to ever grace reality tv, and that’s including the crack hos from HBO’s Hookers at the Point.

All these girls give debauchery a bad name! In the first episode alone, the show featured some of the most horrific, deplorable, vomit-inducing behavior ever broadcast on tv. The highlight, of course, being the scene when Nikki decided to do a shot out of Gia’s disease-infested vajayjay right there on the bar in front of everyone. The best part about it was VH1′s hypocritical attempt to keep it classy by cutting away and having Michaels tell the audience they were unable to show such an act on the network.

Had it not been for this new spin on body shots, my favorite moment would have been the sequence when Marcia drank too much then threw up in the toilet for several minutes, only to plant a big sloppy post-puke kiss on Michaels as he entered the room. He responded in typical fashion by kissing her right back. After all, his usual comment about such grossness is, “It kinda turned me on.”

Sadly (or thankfully depending on your views of trash tv) Nikki was booted from the show. During the elimination, she was so drunk she couldn’t stand up and, even after the rest of the girls had vacated the meat-market platform, she was left flopped out on the ground.

I have a strong stomach for this kind of garbage, but this show is definitely too much for any casual trash tv fan to handle. The whole time I was watching, I kept thinking about equally desensitized Gerard Way, who regularly talks about VH1s Celebreality shows on the My Chemical Romance blog, setting his TiVo to record such awfulness. I guess all of us who watch Rock of Love Bus will continue to gleefully wallow in the cesspool together.

PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. – Police said a Port St. Lucie man was arrested for throwing a sandwich at his girlfriend, the second food attack that sent a man to jail in about a month. According to a police report released Monday, the 20-year-old man threw the sandwich at his girlfriend’s face during an argument about auto insurance and then hit her head with his fist.

The man admitted to throwing the food but not hitting her. He was arrested Friday and faces a battery charge.

Last month, another man was arrested on a battery charge for hitting his girlfriend with a sandwich, knocking her glasses off and nearly causing a traffic crash.

Police reports did not what type of sandwich was used in either attack.

First, I find it amazing that someone who would throw a sandwich at another person has a girlfriend. Who dates a guy who wins an argument by chucking some cold cuts at your head?

Next, it seems that this is one of several sandwich attacks that have occurred in recent times. Perhaps it signals a larger trend towards sandwich assaults as opposed to regular old domestic violence. I like that the second attack “nearly caused a traffic crash”. This means that someone was operating a moving vehicle while a.) throwing a sandwich or b.) being hit with a sandwich. I wonder if insurance covers that.

I just came across this news item while browsing stories on my Mobile News iPhone App. It comes to us from TampaBayOnline…

TAMPA – It must be one special eggbeater.

That was the loot two men demanded after entering a home in Plant City, one brandishing a pistol and the other holding a knife to the resident’s throat, the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office said.

The two men face charges of armed burglary of a dwelling after being caught outside the home on State Road 60 in Plant City about 4:25 a.m. Sunday, the sheriff’s office said.

Deputies arrested Robert Eugene Thompson, of 2211 Holloman Road, Plant City, and Taurus Deshane Morris, of 5852 Odom Road, Lakeland.

Besides the burglary charge, Thompson faces a charge of aggravated assault.

The sheriff’s office said the two men entered the home about 3:35 a.m. Thompson armed himself with a folding knife while Morris held a chrome pistol, arrest reports said.

Thompson held the knife against the victim’s neck and demanded the metal eggbeater, which was found in his left back pocket when he was arrested, the sheriff’s office said.

Thompson and Morris are being held in Orient Road Jail with no bail.

People do some crazy stuff, but this is really spectacular. The very idea that these two face burglary and aggravated assault charges because they just had to have an eggbeater is really astounding to me.

This story was even a bit reminiscent of an old item from the primordial Trashwire about a news story with the headline “Meat juice leads to stolen property”.